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(no subject)
Dec. 22nd, 2008 | 03:21 pm
so i quit my job. i just hated it there, sick of making no money at all and dreading going. so now im just living off of what i make babysitting, which is only like a hundred fifty a week, thats not bad i guess, sucks to have a 90 dollar phone bill though. cut my hair/redyed it black and pierced my tongue. think i might get my nose done too, and tattoo right after christmas!
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(no subject)
May. 22nd, 2008 | 02:52 pm
i have these horrible dreams. they are so strange.
last night i had another about my mom.
" i showed up to this outdoor party thing i have no clue where with mike and i saw my mom!, it was the first day she got out of the hospital and i didn't see her yet. i screamed out, MOM! and ran over to hug her. she looked just like i always remember her as. she gave me the biggest hug ever and i told her how much i missed her." then i woke up. its such a tease having these kinds of dreams. because i really believe they are real. sometimes i feel like that is how ill always communicate with her. is through my dreams. but when i wake up and hit reality it isn't too good. i end up having a horrible day and i usually cry when i wake up. idk what these dreams mean and idk when they will go away. idk what i am supposed to do!
anyways. graduation is coming soon. ahh cant fucking wait to leave bhs forever!!! i need a new job. ill be babysitting alot of days in the summer so i kinda want a good night job at some kind of restaurant or something. maybe a hostess but i would want it to be at a nice restaurant. ill be looking cos i cant stand mickey fucking finns anymore!
last night i had another about my mom.
" i showed up to this outdoor party thing i have no clue where with mike and i saw my mom!, it was the first day she got out of the hospital and i didn't see her yet. i screamed out, MOM! and ran over to hug her. she looked just like i always remember her as. she gave me the biggest hug ever and i told her how much i missed her." then i woke up. its such a tease having these kinds of dreams. because i really believe they are real. sometimes i feel like that is how ill always communicate with her. is through my dreams. but when i wake up and hit reality it isn't too good. i end up having a horrible day and i usually cry when i wake up. idk what these dreams mean and idk when they will go away. idk what i am supposed to do!
anyways. graduation is coming soon. ahh cant fucking wait to leave bhs forever!!! i need a new job. ill be babysitting alot of days in the summer so i kinda want a good night job at some kind of restaurant or something. maybe a hostess but i would want it to be at a nice restaurant. ill be looking cos i cant stand mickey fucking finns anymore!
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and surv.
Mar. 4th, 2008 | 12:13 am
1] Honestly, how many people have you completely fallen for in this school year?
i fell for one person and it was last school year, so this school year, none.
2] Honestly, what color is the shirt you're wearing now?
black, as usual.
3] Honestly, what's on your mind?
mike, my mom, my horrible life.
4] Honestly, what are you doing right now?
talking to mike and christina, watching making the band and doing this survey.
6] Honestly, have you done something bad today?
smoked, if thats considered "bad".
7] Honestly, do you watch "Shot of Love" with Tila Tequilla?
yeah i used too when it was on.
9] Honestly, what makes you happy most of the time?
laying in bed with mike.
10] Honestly, when was the last time you did something illegal?
today and everyday.
11] Honestly, do you want to see someone this very minute?
eh i could do without. but yeah i always wanna see someone.
12] Honestly, do you have deep secrets?
not that deep. in a way though sorta.
13] Honestly, who do you want to kiss?
mike.
14] Honestly, are you an honest person?
im pretty honest. i never lie to parents really or friends or boyfriends, if its so i dont have to hurt someones feelings ill lie though.
15] Honestly, what are you addicted to?
weed, sex, cigarettes, crying, boyfriend.
16] Honestly, where do you see yourself in 10 years?
married, owning my own hair salon, being a stay at home mom for the most part with two little kids. on the wealthy side. still living in this stupid town.
17] Honestly, do you like someone?
obviously.
18] Honestly, who was the last text you got from?
mike.
19] Honestly, what are you sick of?
crying, fighting, life all together, friends, highschool, being broke, it snowing and being cold.
20] Honestly, what do you want right now?
to go to sleep.
21] Honestly, would you use family connections to get a job?
hellllll fucking yes. who wouldnt?
22] Honestly, what's your favorite perfume?
nina ricci.
23] Honestly, are you desperate?
def not.
25] Honestly, have you ever made anyone cry?
who hasn't.
26] Honestly, Macs or PCs?
for sure macs.
27] Honestly, have you ever stabbed a friend in the back?
in a way.
28] Honestly, have you ever been cheated on?
pretty sure i havent been.
29] Honestly, what was your best date ever?
prob the one where mike asked me out. it was perfect.
30] Honestly, what is a personality trait that you find most attractive?
caring and loving.
32] Honestly, are you normally a happy person?
i used to be i guess.
33] Honestly, what makes you mad?
strange religions, politics, age limits, drugs not being legal, death, hospital people, life being way to short, technology.
34] Honestly, what is your greatest fear?
dying and losing someone i love.
35] Honestly, do you lie to people?
small lies here and there.
36] Honestly, are you annoying to people?
eh idkk. i dont really ask or care.
37] Honestly, what would you do if you walked in on your GF/BF(cheating)?
fucking break down and die, thats horrible.
38] Honestly, would you rather save your family members or 1000 strangers?
my family members.
39] Honestly, what religion do you find most annoying?
anything to do with cults, and that weird religion that all the celebs do, that they believe in aliens and shit.
40] Honestly, when was the last time you said I love you?
today.
41] Honestly, are you a relationship person?
of course.
42] Honestly, if you can have one superpower what would it be?
to know what other people are thinking.
43] Who is the last person you hugged?
mikey.
44] Honestly, if you could go back 3 years and change something what would it be?
fucking things up with my group of friends i guess.
45] Honestly, what's your favorite thing to talk about?
myself.
i fell for one person and it was last school year, so this school year, none.
2] Honestly, what color is the shirt you're wearing now?
black, as usual.
3] Honestly, what's on your mind?
mike, my mom, my horrible life.
4] Honestly, what are you doing right now?
talking to mike and christina, watching making the band and doing this survey.
6] Honestly, have you done something bad today?
smoked, if thats considered "bad".
7] Honestly, do you watch "Shot of Love" with Tila Tequilla?
yeah i used too when it was on.
9] Honestly, what makes you happy most of the time?
laying in bed with mike.
10] Honestly, when was the last time you did something illegal?
today and everyday.
11] Honestly, do you want to see someone this very minute?
eh i could do without. but yeah i always wanna see someone.
12] Honestly, do you have deep secrets?
not that deep. in a way though sorta.
13] Honestly, who do you want to kiss?
mike.
14] Honestly, are you an honest person?
im pretty honest. i never lie to parents really or friends or boyfriends, if its so i dont have to hurt someones feelings ill lie though.
15] Honestly, what are you addicted to?
weed, sex, cigarettes, crying, boyfriend.
16] Honestly, where do you see yourself in 10 years?
married, owning my own hair salon, being a stay at home mom for the most part with two little kids. on the wealthy side. still living in this stupid town.
17] Honestly, do you like someone?
obviously.
18] Honestly, who was the last text you got from?
mike.
19] Honestly, what are you sick of?
crying, fighting, life all together, friends, highschool, being broke, it snowing and being cold.
20] Honestly, what do you want right now?
to go to sleep.
21] Honestly, would you use family connections to get a job?
hellllll fucking yes. who wouldnt?
22] Honestly, what's your favorite perfume?
nina ricci.
23] Honestly, are you desperate?
def not.
25] Honestly, have you ever made anyone cry?
who hasn't.
26] Honestly, Macs or PCs?
for sure macs.
27] Honestly, have you ever stabbed a friend in the back?
in a way.
28] Honestly, have you ever been cheated on?
pretty sure i havent been.
29] Honestly, what was your best date ever?
prob the one where mike asked me out. it was perfect.
30] Honestly, what is a personality trait that you find most attractive?
caring and loving.
32] Honestly, are you normally a happy person?
i used to be i guess.
33] Honestly, what makes you mad?
strange religions, politics, age limits, drugs not being legal, death, hospital people, life being way to short, technology.
34] Honestly, what is your greatest fear?
dying and losing someone i love.
35] Honestly, do you lie to people?
small lies here and there.
36] Honestly, are you annoying to people?
eh idkk. i dont really ask or care.
37] Honestly, what would you do if you walked in on your GF/BF(cheating)?
fucking break down and die, thats horrible.
38] Honestly, would you rather save your family members or 1000 strangers?
my family members.
39] Honestly, what religion do you find most annoying?
anything to do with cults, and that weird religion that all the celebs do, that they believe in aliens and shit.
40] Honestly, when was the last time you said I love you?
today.
41] Honestly, are you a relationship person?
of course.
42] Honestly, if you can have one superpower what would it be?
to know what other people are thinking.
43] Who is the last person you hugged?
mikey.
44] Honestly, if you could go back 3 years and change something what would it be?
fucking things up with my group of friends i guess.
45] Honestly, what's your favorite thing to talk about?
myself.